Friday, 30 November 2018

The Emoji Mystery


Emojis give me an insight into how it feels to be autistic.

I don’t usually have trouble reading people’s expressions. But confronted with a bank of emojis I can never find one that reflects the way I’m feeling.
In fact, I cannot at all fathom the emotions they are supposed to represent.
I feel like an autistic child asked to identify the expressions of faces in photos.
I’m mystified.

Thinking this disability marked me out as abnormal, I never mentioned it.  I played safe with a colon, dash and bracket   :-  )

Then Ann admitted she didn’t get it either.
Worse – she revealed that emojis have secondary meanings which we poor middle-aged folks will never ever be able to stay abreast of.
When she was at the cinema with her daughter, during an advert, an emoji of an aubergine was shown.  People giggled. Ann’s daughter explained that an aubergine refers to an excited man.
Ann was horrified – she had been using it to signify grocery shopping at Waitrose.

A mutual friend whatsapped a smiley face to her kids.  They mocked her mercilessly.  Apparently she had sent them “the paedophile face”.

I have no idea which one “the paedophile face” is, and am now terrified of using it by accident.
So inevitably it seems that I am doomed forever to hand-craft my smileys from elements of punctuation ; - )




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