So that's what my friends think of me...

At a.m recent gathering of our friends, we (unwisely) put up pics and asked for captions.

Here are some of our favourites.

 'There's two born every minute.'

 Does it have an ensuite?

 Public Enemy number one is captured finally.

 I hear the Vegan breakfast is to die for.

 It is okay Sir this van is electric.

 Irish stew in the name of the law.

  Letsby Avenue

'And this is why the Bronze Age was so disappointing.'

'The most embarrassing moment of my life? Well what do I choose?'

 Only one participant again, but at least everyone agrees with me.

 Break out rooms could be tricky.

 Who is that idiot grinning at me... oh.

 

 I told you not to eat meat.

 Hi everybody! (Aside) Are you sure you're not an Eco toilet?

 Nigel has a light bulb moment.

 One of these is very bright the other less so.

  

I've had a good sit down and a good long thing and I still don't know what that pale thing is.

 The revived Doctor Who finally runs out of budget.

Well this is a trifle awkward.

 Where exactly did you bury the car keys?

The first test is a success - the glue is strong enough to hold a dove.  Next step - a cat.

 You can't walk or move suddenly or they get into a flap - humans are like that I'm afraid.

 Help I've got a Nigel stuck on my foot.

 It's okay no one sees the back.

 One more comment and I will change this to a number one.

Hair all done.  Teeth next.

None of the captions for this were very funny, but I like the pic so thought I’d include it anyway!

Interesting Device

Living with grown-up offspring is not at all like living with little children.

The other day, I popped into the bathroom and came to a standstill.

There on the side of the bath was…a device.

I did not recognise it, but then, I’ve led a sheltered life.

Could I deduce what it was for?

In shape it was tall and thin with a nozzle at one end and a hand grip at the other.

On the side was the brand name – NiceFeel.

There was a button with settings – Normal, Soft, Pulse.

Gingerly, I put it back down.

How to deal with this?

I decided that I would just leave it where it was. 

The owner would soon spot it and put it away.

Twenty-four hours later, it was still on the side of the bath.

Perran was even in there washing his face as if there was nothing the matter.

I could stand the suspense no longer.

“Perran….what is that thing on the side of the bath?”

“Oh – that’s my oral irrigator – it’s for flossing your teeth but with a high-powered jet of water, instead of  tape …look!”

“Oh.  Okay.”

“I swear by them.  In fact, this is my second one – my first wore out. Here.”

He pulled another similar device from the bathroom cupboard.

“If it’s broken, why have you kept it?”

“Not sure how to recycle it.”

“Well, your Dad’s an expert on recycling waste electrical items.  Why don’t we just leave it for him on his bedside table?”

*             *             *

7pm: Nigel has arrived home and gone upstairs to change.

Startled voice from upstairs:  “For Pete’s sake, what on earth is THIS?”